NEARLY every mall and radio stations have started to play songs that you'd hear only at this time of the year — it's the most wonderful time of the year; 'tis the season to be jolly; you better watch out, you better not cry; and so on.
For the most part and for many people, that's what it's like for them. A joyful time of the year filled with celebrations and get-togethers. Planning the holidays can be fun because it's filled with delightful anticipation.
It can be this way if you have the resources and adequate help to kick off your plans. But since it's the holiday season and many people want to take advantage of the long weekends or to finish off their annual leave, getting assistance may take some planning and manoeuvring.
When you have a loved one who's unwell, or is mentally and/or physically challenged, you need to make plans way in advance. Take for example, my son Omar who's both physically and mentally challenged.
He's a joy to be with and on most days, he's not that difficult to care for. He's a happy young man who has a certain level of understanding, enough to follow simple instructions. Unfortunately, he isn't independent and needs assistance for everything for his entire life.
Omar goes to a centre that caters for children and adults. They have daily activities that fill up their time throughout the day. More importantly, there are routines that he loves as well as friends whose company he enjoys.
Omar is saddest when he's at home for days on end. Those Covid-19 lockdown years were the worst for him, especially the first few months. My heart breaks every time I recall those days when he insisted on sitting outside, near the gate, to wait for the van to come and pick him up for "school" — and that van never showed up.
He didn't understand that there was no "school". He didn't understand that there was Movement Control Order (MCO), where you can't leave the house without a valid reason. Later on, when he could go out, he couldn't comply by wearing a mask so he had to stay home.
I was at a loss. I didn't know how else I could get him to understand that. You'd think it was simple, but you don't know how hard it is to reason with someone whose reasoning is simpler than common sense.
Gosh! Those days really feel like a lifetime ago! When there are days that Omar is unable to go out and do what he usually does, memories of those lockdown days would surface. Boy, the anxiety!
Thank goodness those extreme days are over. I hope and pray that we'd never have to go through something that critical ever again!
COVERING ALL BASES
What can we do to plan what we need to do in advance so that we don't have to go helter-skelter for things we need done? First, check the medications that are needed on a daily basis, as well as those for emergencies.
You should also check all the medications you currently have at home for their expiry date. Dispose the expired ones and replenish with new ones. If you need new prescriptions for those medications, ensure you've made the necessary appointments with the various doctors before they go on leave.
If you're new to the caregiving scene, discuss with your doctor or the nurses about what to do in case of emergencies. If your doctor goes on leave, who's his replacement? Are you happy with him/her? Would there be someone else you could go to?
Do you have caregivers who'll assist you? What are their schedules like? Are they going on leave? If the private nurses go on leave, or if you, as the primary caregiver, need a break, would there be others in the family like your siblings, relatives or friends who could take over? It may not be for days, but even just a few hours would be helpful to allow you time to run your errands.
In Omar's case, I'd always be so happy if the centre he goes to organises "holiday school", where he could go and spend a few hours a day. It sure beats staying home and getting bored.
Another thing I learnt from those lockdown days is that you can simplify your life by ordering food to go. Those two years created quite a few home chefs who'd be happy to cater to your party requirements.
Cut back on doing everything yourself. Delegate if you can. Order out from reliable and affordable sources. Scale down on the festivities. Manage expectations by telling others that things will be different this year.
Focus on things that can spark joy, no matter how small. Don't sweat the petty things. Once you've got that, you're ready to party!
[The views expressed in this article are the writer's own.]
Putri Juneita Johari volunteers for the Special Community Society of Ampang. She can be reached at [email protected].
