WE all want everybody to listen and fulfill our requests without hesitation. Parents want their children to obey them. Bosses want their subordinates to do everything they say. What a wonderful world it'd be if that were so. But in reality, it's not that easy to positively influence others. Some people rely on their position and power, while and others use their personal capabilities.
POSITIONAL POWER
Positional power is usually perceived as a one-way street where instructions come from those in a higher position, with little discussion and consultation. In a worst-case scenario, the person in power is viewed as a dictator running an autocratic regime. Not much value is placed on other people's opinions because the person either doesn't understand the feeling of others or simply doesn't care. As a result, the others are not empowered to do anything else besides just following orders from the authority.
Imagine working for a boss who demonstrates such behaviour. Those working under a very authoritarian person would find that many important decisions are made without them being consulted. They may not show it, but the underlying feelings are generally very negative. They can't wait to "get out" of the place, either physically or emotionally. Before long, they'd be looking for another job.
In the long run, continuous overuse of positional power, whether in the office or at home, will cause resentment, ingenuity, de-motivation, and frustration. Is there a better alternative to positional power?
MEET "PERSONAL POWER"
This is the power that we all possess, regardless of our position. It comes from within when we do the right thing. It's further shaped by our integrity, adherence to rules and regulations, and a general respect for fellow human beings.
People who regularly use this power effectively is perceived as one who engages others thoroughly before making important decisions. They have open discussions and ensure positive interaction with others. Be it their subordinates or children, they believe in everyone's ability to contribute. As a result, there's a strong sense of understanding within the team; the one where its members are appropriately empowered to do their tasks.
Now, show me such a boss and I'll show you a long line of jobseekers looking forward to report to him/her.
We must be like these consultative people. Never make important decisions without consulting those we trust. Talk and discuss in a positive manner, and trust that your young children are capable of contributing positively to the discussion.
Seek input and respect them. When the overall feeling is positive, it will draw people to get involved. Disputes and misunderstanding can be dealt with fairly.
Everyone's given a chance to explain. If this can happen in a family, its members will look forward to come home to experience such a positive environment.
BALANCING THE POWER
In some cases, positional power is necessary to get things done. When pre-agreed rules are broken, strict action is probably more effective than trying to reason with the offenders.
However, for other matters, adopting the attitude of "let's do this together" will propel the organisation, be it business or family, to an unimaginable height of success and happiness!
Zaid Mohamad coaches and trains others to bring out their best while enjoying a peaceful, purposeful life. Reach him at [email protected].
